Deconstructing Cornelius... part one

We are only 57 days into 2006 and the world and it's players have begun the yearly jaunt of madness. I was so hoping that we could at least get half way through before I started to suffer from "ignorance" overload from the various levels of governement and my fellow citizens. However, I have already started the "deconstructing" process of myself, by positioning my intellect in strategic offense to thwart the government spin verbage, those daily outright lies we have to endure and the "what in the hell were they thinking" catergory that's often brimming with so many obsurd tidbits they cause me to make sure that I've been properly medicated.

In the 2/11/06 edition of the Arkansas Democrat Gazzette, I read an unsettling story concerning the Dept. of Health/ HIV Unit "so-called" scandal of 2005. It seems that the former Team Leader, Lola Thrower was found gulity of "aiding and abbetting" connected indivudals, Lee Langston, Rev. Lamar Wright and M. Blackmon, with gaining access to federal funds. Believe it or not, Rev. Wright was on the Broadway Joe Talk show on KOKY seeking donations for his "Save the Children Project" from the African American commninty on 2/26/06. Even though I have'nt had a chance to read the complete case history, I have mixed feeling concerning the entire affair and the republished stories that have literally reached from coast to coast. Since this case broke, the rumor mills and gossip mongers have had a field day with what appears to be some misinformation, conspiracy theories and many venomous character attacks from all sides. I'm not condoning such misdeeds, but would be open to hearing the facts that has caused this error in judgement. According to court documents the sentencing for Thrower will occur in June. As this matter closes, I can't help but ponder is the HIV division any better off, are services enhanced? Does any know or care? Stay tune...

February, the shortest month of the year is also known as Black History Month and the usual suspect trout out to give there ceremonious salute to famous African- Americans past and present. Yet, this year actor Morgan Freeman stated that this reconignition has run it course and is no longer needed. His pearls of wisdom were apart of an interview with 60 minutes dieheart Mike Wallace, whom seem genuinely suprised at his firmness about the issue. As for myself, I don't share his view. I feel it's important that we keep the fire of the month burning all year.Especially, since each day we are making Black history, by continuing to pursue courses of empowerment, excellence and the destiny we have been appointed. Mr. Freeman's remarks are well respected since he feels that we should move past distinctions and revel in our commonality. I'm for all of that and keeping the month as well. Why don't you surf over and check out Blackpeople.com for some interesting reading.

The OC in 08. I was stupified when I saw this direct marketing blurb as I was surfing the net. My curiosity was peaked and I had to find out if this was that dredded TV show about beautiful people or a new cleaning product. NO, it was a line of items touting the political ticket of Hilary Clinton and Osama Obamma for President in 2008. This unlikely coupling would certainly be a hoot and holla for the spin cycles of America. Perhaps I will offer some of those items here for your collections. After all, it's all about for the people and by the people. Let me know what you think, nealix101@comcast.net

No Casseroles

As we grow older and become updated figments of our parents, we often reflect on the many conversations or either those catechism that our elder nuturers have shared with us over the years. These nuggets of wisdom and muster usually are deflected by us as we find our way to maturity, yet one that sticks in my mind and constantly haunts me, is from my mother who always states," as sure as we live, we all gotta die." This breif statement rooted in her overall embracing of religion, not only rings ture, but has provided my with some comforting relief despite it's ominous meaning. With each death in our family we have been surrounded by the outpouring of services, goods and most of all food. All these wonderful breads, beverages and other comfort foods, are a common display of condolences from your community. I witnessed many friends, neighbors, and strangers alike offering there contributions of eggs, juices, hams and other covered dishes. Traditionally in the Black community, funerals although a sad occasion, are treated as a unique "home going" for the deceased and a celebration of fellowship with those commemorating their life. My recent lost of my youngest brother was reinforced with this showering of concern and respect for the love ones who were left behind. But, as I stood amidst all this warmth and endearing atmosphere, I couldn't help but feel some contempt and an uneasiness that perhaps I hadn't developed binding relationships to have personal friends who seemed moved to respond. Looking around the various deliveries, I had hoped to find some notes from people I knew, but I found no care packages, no cakes and most of all, no casseroles. In the subsequent weeks, my thought patterns hearkened back when I lost my lifemate in 1995. Despite my stern demeanor then and now, I've analyzed that those strong ties and friendships that I thought I once had, have all but become surface memories and occurrences of times past. Our tiny apartment we shared, once hosted many with our brand of hospitality, but was a hub of silence prior to the funeral and certainly afterwards. I didn't experience the same warmth and love that all these years later I'm seeing being directed to my immediate family. Cultivating and neutering relationships are a necessity in human contact, especially when celebrating a home going. I have to assume my responsibility in keeping contacts alive and making efforts to stay in touch. Over the years, some have perceived me to be aloof and distant. I stand guilty, but life has a way of forcing change in a person and I have been in a constant exploration of my purpose as well as my legacy to the world. Nevertheless, today's society is so fraught with individuals who are caught up in "keeping up appearances," that often we are repelled at peeling away the many mask that approach us daily. Forging careers and ultimately finding a lifemate is paramount,but rediscovering old friends and making new ones must be apart of that strategy. Just as my mother's adage reaffirms, I have to add, even though "we all must die", I hope that I ultimately don't do it without some true friends. Feel the need to reach out and touch at Nealix101@comcast.net